Navigating relationships isn’t easy. Whether you want better romantic, familial, or platonic connections, you’re going to need we need to put in the emotional labor. And it’s hard work.
Though the less-than-ideal behaviors get the best of us, and we all display certain toxic traits now and then.
No one wants to hurt the people they care for and love, but that doesn’t mean you’re not damaging your relationships.
10 Toxic Habits That Are Hurting Your Relationship
1•Minimizing or invalidating other people’s feelings
When something terrible happens, we typically confide in those we love and trust. And undoubtedly just the same, there are who come to us when they are upset.
The problem is that you might be minimizing or invalidating other’s feelings without realizing it.
When you feel someone doubt themselves by invalidating their emotions and feeling, that can make them feel worse, even unloved or unworthy.
That doesn’t mean you need to agree with them, but it does mean you need to make an effort to acknowledge their feelings.
2• Not Respecting Boundaries
Healthy relationships have boundaries that are respected. Boundaries between relationships can be physical or emotional, it includes touching on topics like how you spend your with each other, what you feel comfortable doing or not doing, and even what you talk about. When you show respect, it communicates that you genuinely care.
If you find yourself overstepping, it means you’re disrespecting someone’s boundaries. And if pushing someone’s limits is no matter to you, you may need to rethink how you see other people’s time and space.
Your entitlement could be creating discomfort and distance between each other and damage your relationships.
3• Always Having to be Right
If you need to always be right often, shut down conversations. And you probably make people feel unheard, and they might start to see you as cocky, obnoxious, or rude. That goes for new acquaintances as much as it does for family members or old friends. Accepting that you were wrong and you made a mistake is essential for growth, and it conveys a sense of respect and acceptance for the opinions of each other.
4• Insulting Others
It’s never okay to intentionally hurt your partner, no matter how upset or angry you are. We all know that explicit insults are toxic, but it’s also important to recognize that backhanded compliments and jokes can be just as harmful.
If you make comments like “I love how you don’t care how you come across,” then causing self-doubt and others probably comes as second nature to you.
Purposefully making them feel bad about themselves is toxic and, it will ruin your long-lasting relationships.
5• Giving Unsolicited Advice
You might have the best intentions. But when you give unsolicited advice, it often works as patronizing.
As a general rule, assume that people don’t want to hear advice unless they ask for it. Putting in your two cents on your terms instead will drive others away out of annoyance. And even though you mean well, your advice could spoil a healthy relationship.
For a strong relationship, there must be mutual trust. And something that ruins these bonds like nothing else is lying.
Being honest in difficult situations can mean having hard and uncomfortable conversations, but when you consider the havoc and heartache that lying can cause, honesty is the better option. When it comes to relationships, you need to be honest with each other and with yourself. Denying the truth in a relationship will only delay and amplify any subsequent pain.
7• Acting on Your Envy
Envy is a very human feeling and emotion, and on its own, it’s harmless. Between couples, the issue arises when we act on envy. It’s okay to desire what someone else has, but it’s not okay to treat others and unkindly, belittle their accomplishments or hurl nasty comments their way simply because they have something you don’t.
When you treat others like this, you destroy your relationships. In contrast, when you celebrate alongside them, you nourish your connections with your partner. Practice giving credit where it is due, and consider what you can learn from the people you envy.
We’re all familiar with the guilt trip every day in the life, but using guilt as a tool for getting your way is manipulative and toxic. Even when it works, you still lose because your relationship suffers.
If someone takes advantage of people with emotional blackmail, they’ll start to resent you and resist helping you or even spending time with you.
9• Constant Criticism
While there’s nothing wrong with constructive criticism, your need to help might be making the people you care about feel bad. When you constantly criticize someone, they start to fear themselves and are less likely to improve at all.
If you want to support your relationships, avoid making others feel like they’re constantly doing things wrong by keeping your critiques to yourself.
10• Always Needing to be in Control
No one appreciates someone who always feels compelled to be the boss of others or insists on making all the decisions.
Your loved ones have their own choice, opinions, and desires. And they don’t always want you to take charge. Allow others to take the wheel sometimes, letting them choose where to eat, plan the next get-together, or decide how to do something.
When you let go of your constant need to be in control, you show your respect and trust in other people’s abilities and ideas.